Livonia, MI

In July of 1996, I finally got what I had wanted for so long- a positive pregnancy test. My husband Allen and I had been married a little over a year and had been trying to conceive almost that long. Soon I was feeling the little butterfly kicks in my tummy. All went well until December of 1996. Early in the month I got very sick I was exhausted, had a constant fever, and felt like I was going to be sick all the time. I also had a headache and body aches that I could just not shake. I was in bed for over a week straight. I went to see my OB/GYN, but he just thought it was the flu. The next week, I still felt bad but started to get a bad cough and cold. I was told to see my internist. He said I had bronchitis and put me on antibiotics. Soon I felt somewhat better. I returned to work part time.

I did not feel great, but it was better than before, I had noticed that the baby didn't seem to be moving as much so I went back to my OB/GYN. He did a NST(non-stress test) and it seemed OK. I was told that because of all the coughing maybe I just wasn't feeling her kick as much. At this point, I was about 27 weeks pregnant.

Another week passed, I felt the same and I was still concerned because I wasn't feeling the baby as much. I tried to remain positive and hope the doctors were right. It is now Christmas Eve, and I am back in the doctor's office because I am sure that I am having contractions and I am scared. Again an NST test shows nothing. I am sent home and told to call if anything new happens. At about 9PM, I lose my mucus plug. I call the doctor, I am frantic, he tells me to come straight to the hospital.

We get there, and I am now hysterical. No one knows what is happening. They hook me up to another NST machine that still doesn't show anything. It seems as though I was having back labor and the machine could not pick it up. Floods of people parade through my room. Some tell me they may do a C-section, some tell me I will soon deliver naturally, but no one tells me why this is happening. It is a big scary blur.

At 2 AM I deliver a 3 1/2 lb baby girl who we name Morgan Faith. I get to see her for about 30 seconds before they whisk her off to the NICU. After I am cleaned up, they take me to the NICU where I finally get a good look at my little girl. She is very purple with dark colored specks all over her body. Her stomach is very big, because of her liver. (We find out later that the liver grew very big to try to fight off the infection). She is on a ventilator which is helping her breathe and has many tube coming off of her.

At first the NICU staff is hopeful, her size is good, she has a decent chance of making it through. I don't sleep that night, I keep going to the NICU to be with her. I see the scariest thing ever during this night: she stops breathing even with the machine. A nurse thumps on her chest and she starts again.

The next morning we are told that they do not know what is causing Morgan's problems and that there is a good chance she will not live. I am horrified. How can this be happening? What can be causing this? I spend as much time with my new baby as possible. I am able to hold her and rock her for short periods of time. She has a pretty face and very long thin fingers.

On the day after Christmas the lab tests start to come back. I am told that my baby has Listeria. This means nothing to me. I have not heard of Listeria.

I am not given much information except for the fact that it was probably something that I ate while I was pregnant and it is now killing my baby. At around 10PM the day after Christmas, it succeeds in doing just that. My precious little girl fought hard, but her little body was too badly damaged from the Listeria to make it.

My husband and I left the hospital crushed and bewildered. We began studying about Listeria and found that it can be in a wide variety of foods. Foods like lunch meat, unpasteurized dairy products, and hot dogs are of the most concern. I still do not know why pregnant women are not told about this bacteria. I was told not to smoke or drink or have caffeine. I avoided all of what I was told the "bad" things were, but it didn't matter. I lost my baby. I hope others will hear this and understand where Listeria can be found and avoid it along with the other "bad" things.

Copyright 2001 by author: Angela Babosh (Morgan's mother)

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